As
a woman who struggles with being completely satisfied in Christ
alone, I must confess something that has occurred lately... There has
been a trend of people reminding me of how awesome my future husband
is going to be and how excited they are for that day to come. I know
these comments are kind, well meaning, and true... BUT it can be
tempting to look forward instead of being satisfied with where my
feet are currently placed. We often become so
fixated on life's "next best" step that we forget to enjoy
the now. We have conformed to a culture of constant motion that has caused us to
overlook resting in God alone. God challenged me a couple weeks ago
to climb a tree (I love climbing trees) on the middle of campus and
to sit completely still- clearing my mind of everything... Even
stopping the urge to fill the awkward silence with prayer. He was
challenging me to let His presence be my satisfaction. All of me
wanted to take pictures of how the tree branches wove through the
sky, or how the sun made the bark glow, but God's request was loud
and clear- be still. I probably only lasted about five
minutes before I started moving around again. What I keep realizing
is that when it comes to our hearts, we often neglect absorbing the
stillness. It feels awkward and out of place and is much easier to
find something or someone to pursue. We have forgotten to tend to our
hearts in such a way that causes us to be relentless pursuers of God
instead of a Godly relationship. There is definitely beauty in a
Godly relationship but I have found in my own struggle that often
times even the pursuit of a godly relationship (not even the act of
being in one) becomes more of a focus and even obsession than the pursuit of God Himself.
"You keep him in perfect peace
whose mind is stayed on you,
because he trusts in you." - Isaiah 26:3
This
past Valentine's day was probably the greatest Valentine's day I have
ever experienced! Yes, it is possible for a single woman to enjoy
Valentine's day and not let it be a barf-fest, a “forever alone”
wallowing day, or "singles awareness day"... The purpose of
Valentine's day is to celebrate love and affection. I have learned
that love is a choice. That even on our worst days we have to decide
whether or not we are going to grab a hold of God's love and let Him
be our source. On Valentine's day I chose to grab a hold of God's
love and asked that he would draw me closer to Him singing Steffany
Frizzell's “Closer” lyrics, “Pull me a little closer, take me a
little deeper, I wanna know your heart, I wanna know your heart.
Cause your love is so much sweeter than anything I've tasted, I wanna
know your heart, I wanna know your heart.” The entire day felt so
special as I basked in the love of Christ and celebrated the fact
that he allows us to share in loving one another. Whether it be
through the stars in the night sky, or the words in a movie script,
God's love was breaking into my heart again. By the end of the day I
was a basket case, completely overwhelmed by the depth of love God
shares with us and how often we overlook it.
Valentine's day will
always hold a special place in my heart because of Him who created
love and loved me first! He fills my awkward silences, takes me on
adventures, asks me to make a fool of myself, makes me laugh
uncontrollably, and desires to be my one and only. While loving
God through the journeys, joys, stillness, struggles, and sacrifices,
I am learning that, “there's no place I would rather be than here
in your love” (Will Reagan, Set
A Fire).
Be still, my friends, soak up every bit of where He has placed your feet currently and let HIM be your pursuit!
